Tag: anchored HOPE

Mental health

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What does mental health mean to you? Where do you fit in the scales?
According to mental health.gov mental health includes our emotional, psychological, and social well being. It affects how we think, feel and act. It also helps how we determine how we handle stress, relate to others, and make choices.

Webmd states that millions of Americans live with various types of mental illness and mental health problems. Such as social anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder, drug addiction, and personality disorders.

Signs to watch for:

  • Eating or sleeping too much or too little
  • Pulling away from people or activities.
  • Low Energy.
  • Numb-nothing matters.
  • Feeling helpless.
  • Smoking, drinking or using drugs more than usual.
  • Confused, forgetful on edge.
  • Angry, yelling or fighting with family and friends.
  • Mood swings that cause problems in relationships.
  • Thinking of harming yourself.
  • Inability to do daily tasks.

Nami.org statistics are 1 in 5 experience mental illness. 1 in 25 experience a serious mental illness that interferes with major life activities. 2.6% have bi-polar. 6.9 have a major depressive episode in a year. 18.1% have PTSD, OCD or phobia. 20.2 million experienced a substance use disorder. 50.5% 10.2 million had a co-occurring mental illness.

How do we change?

We must get rid of the Stigma the bad stigma prevents people from talking because they are afraid of how to talk about and deal with it. The Columbia suicide severity rating scale has come up with 6 questions to help get people talking to help. We need to allow religion back into our lives.

Problems with the system. Most insurances will not cover mental health check-ups and treatment. If they do it is only a small percentage of what is needed. Many people with mental health issues avoid adding another bill and even the companies that offer a sliding scale it is still a bill to be added on top of a struggling budget in families. Most people do not want to surrender to God. It is a scary idea to let go of your life to a supreme being and put your trust in someone else if you already have trust issues from your past.

My Proposal for change — make mental health check-ups mandatory like a physical on insurance companies. Think of how many could improve their quality of life with even just one visit a year equipping them with tools and ideas. How many school shootings, waffle house shootings, crime in general, as well as suicide rates, would go down if we get people help sooner rather than later. Also, find a church that fits your beliefs and check if they have a community group or small group of others with a mental illness to get plugged into. Grow and encourage each other the way God intended. We are all part of a family; we just need to find our spot. Many will argue that we cannot afford to add that feature. But think of the costs of one shooting. Costs to repair the building, the people, the personnel required overall would save this money. According to nami.org, serious mental health illness costs $193.2 billion in lost earnings per year due to mental illness! Start helping people by taking that lost revenue and use for the good of others. Considering 1 in 5 people have a mental illness, most churches have more than 5 people so I would assume there are others out there that you can connect with and understand what you are feeling. We were never meant to carry the burdens of life without God by our side to help us. He is waiting to help us and to be our Father to heal our brokenness.

Let us ban together and start to change statistics. I have known 4 people who have taken their lives. It is not the coward’s way out as some would say, but a way to make the voices stop and the mental pain to end. Many feel like the world would be a better place without them. How do I know this? Because I battle this daily- I keep pressing on because God kept me from going through with it. Now my focus is to raise awareness and to Glorify Him. Because without him my kids would not have their mom and my husband of fewer than 2 years would be raising our fur babies alone. So, I fight to make sure to help to try to make a way that no child will be
without their parent or spouse without the other. I fight to help others learn there is a God who loves them more than they can realize.

I pray that you will help and end the stigma and be the person God created you to be to help save a life.

Jesus loves me

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So often we will take a simple song for granted, Jesus loves me this I know for the Bible tells me so. We teach this to our kids but as an adult how often do we forget the basic meaning of this song? We look to others as a source of love, we look to things or even get to thinking that we are not worthy of anyone loving us. Yet, this simple song tells us differently. We hear of a love that can never be duplicated, even as a parent we love our kids but at times we do not always do the right thing. We make mistakes and yet, God still is there through it all. Our heavenly Father made a way for all of us to be redeemed. In our earthly life, we will encounter trials and tribulations.

People will let us down, parents will disappoint us, kids will be defiant, and we will run away from God and compare him to an earthly dad. This is so not the case. Our earthly fathers will sometimes show us everything that God is not. We learn that as we grow older though that our dads tried. Many did not have a great example themselves; they went through a rough life and have no idea how to be a parent. They did not know what to do so many would just be absent dads. Our Heavenly Father is anything but absent. If you ask him in, he will guide you and help you through the trials of life.

We need to get back to the basics and just give in to the love that Christ has for us. He came down from heaven to be born in a very simple manner in order to pay the ultimate price to save us all. As we enter the Christmas season let us not forget that the basis of this season is LOVE. It is not the wrappings or gifts or anything of that sort. It is the ultimate gift of love for all of us in order to make a way for us to enter into heaven. So, sing that song but think of the deep meaning behind it.

Jesus loves you no matter what you have done, no matter how far you have strayed, no matter how worthless you feel; Jesus loves you. He loves you in the darkness and in the light. He loves you and your flaws; he loves you and your sins; he loves you and despite all that we have done- HE LOVES YOU! Take his love and let it help you heal from all the things in the past that try to bring you down. Know that no matter what you think, there is one that loves you and is always there for you.

Jealousy

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How many times have we wished for something someone else had? How many times have we wished we looked like another person? Have you ever just wanted to break down and cry or worse thinking that the grass would be greener if you were someone else?  What about how amazing that dress looked on her or her hair? Wow, I wish I had parents like them? I wish I could win the lottery. How are her kids so well behaved? Their house is just beautiful why can’t we have that? What about trying to keep up with the “Jones’”? So often in life, we don’t hold value to what we have thought that there is something better on the other side. We are all in the race together so let’s celebrate the accomplishments of each other rather than inwardly coveting their blessings. I can say that I’ve had some of these issues and it’s not an easy thing to be green with envy over something else.

My biggest jealousy was always of my brothers. They both have their lives pretty together and both have amazing wives that support them and love them no matter what. Our parents on each side in my eyes favored them, and I would always hear how amazing they were and how awesome their wives are. For a long time, this just caused me to sink further into a pit. I wondered why wasn’t I that awesome? Why wasn’t I good enough for the phone calls or messages that I heard they would get? Why didn’t I feel like they approved of anything I did or bragged on me for being awesome also? I was seeking their approval after all I had done to hurt them, and I pray someday that they would think I’m awesome also. I would feel like the black sheep and after a long time of dwelling on this, it came to my attention that I brought a lot of it on myself as an adult. I have spent a lot of time in prayer over this one because I know the Bible says not to covet. It also says that,

“Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?”

Proverbs 27:4, NIV

To me, this is saying that jealousy will poison our soul worse than anger or fury and I’ve been working to cleanse my soul, not add to it.

The childhood jealousy I haven’t figured out except that I was a constant reminder to the other parent of a marriage that failed. I understand this more after going through a divorce and I have a son that is a spitting image of his father. It’s hard but you must get past it. The child is not responsible for their parents’ actions, look deeper and love the child no matter who gave birth or provided the seed for that beautiful baby to come into this life. All children are a gift from God no matter how they come into this world. We need to cherish them and train them correctly. They desire love and attention just like anyone else. Inside a lot of us is still a child seeking the approval and attention of their parent. Thankfully there is a father who loves us no matter what and wants to have a relationship with him. We just need to open that door and let him in.


As an adult, I pushed my parents away because of decisions I made thinking I knew better than they did. I listened to someone who did not have my best interests at heart and in the end, cost me almost 20 years of time with my parents. That huge gap of time is not something we will ever get back but can only try to move forward. It’s a slow process, sometimes slower than I wish. I get very impatient wanting my parents to be in my life, but they have their lives also.   I keep reading,

“But each person should examine his own work, and then he will have a reason for boasting in himself alone, and not with respect to someone else. For each person will have to carry his own load. The one who is taught the message must share his goods with the teacher. Don’t be deceived; God is not mocked. For whatever a man sows he will also reap, because the one who sows to his flesh will reap corruption from the flesh, but the one who sows to the Spirit will reap eternal life from the Spirit. So, we must not get tired of doing good, for we will reap at the proper time if we don’t give up. Therefore, as we have an opportunity, we must work for the good of all, especially for those who belong to the household of faith.”

Galatians 6:4-10

So I will continue to sow in the word and reap the rewards when he is ready for me too.

I will be proud of my brothers for all of their accomplishments and achievements and still strive to regain my parents, but I will not let it be the center of my well being. My approval and acceptance come from Christ alone, everyone else is just a bonus. My blessings will come at the time appointed by God and until that time I will bless as many as I can within my power to do so. I saw a post on Facebook from @SimpleSteps2Happy that said, “Today… I choose to be Simply Happy” Go forth all my friends and make each other a blessing rather than coveting and let’s change the world.

philosophical

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This was my philosophy final that I submitted but felt that it had some good points so I am sharing. 

“Everyone’s worldview is a bit different from that of everyone else; moreover, worldviews can change subtly and unconsciously over the years.” (Sire, 2015) Each person has their own thoughts on what is true or false, right or wrong or their way of thinking. Everyone’s view of life can be traced back to how they are raised, tragedies that they endure, the life that they live and the belief system that in place of their life. Each part of a person’s life will categorize how they believe, what they believe and why they believe the way that they do. “We can divide the kinds of evidence at our disposal into three categories: fact (or empirical evidence); reason (or logical thinking); and experience (or human nature and the experience of life)”.(Wade, ND)
It can also be said that a “Worldview is a set of presuppositions (assumptions which may be true, partially true or entirely false) which we hold (consciously or subconsciously, consistently or inconsistently) about the basic makeup of our world”. (Sire, 2015) We are all taught to believe a certain way growing up, then as we experience life it teaches us different patterns and beliefs that we learn for ourselves. Sometimes good and sometimes bad but overall, these are what make us into the person that we are.
I try to believe that everyone has a good side that they need to rely on and let rule rather than give in to the dark side. Yet, as a victim of many dark side incidents, I still want to give everyone more chances than they deserve because I know what it is like to be looked down on and made to feel unworthy. I just feel that I’m not worthy in so many situations so how could I judge them and I will try to extend Grace to everyone. I believe that situations will carve a person’s life even from childhood through adulthood whether they want to admit it or not. When different situations arise, they may react differently based upon the past or how they were taught to think. I know I react differently to some than others will. I shake and curl into a ball at loud noises of yelling or cussing. This is traced back to my childhood and first marriage since after yelling and loud cussing it’s usually when the violence and abuse would happen. Others will either take it in stride and not let it impact them on the mental level or they will let it dwell in their minds and affect their overall way of thinking. This is a result of how mental illness can take effect on the brain and cause it to react differently. I have become very passionate about mental illness and the ill effects that it can have on a person’s thinking if they aren’t anchored correctly.
Mental Illness is becoming a topic that is needed to be discussed more. As the world has more incidents of evil coming into play it is becoming more evident that we all need to learn to talk to each other and end the stigma that having a mental illness is a disease that can be caught. You rarely will hear of anyone wanting to talk about their mental health yet so often we hear of physical health. While that is very important our mental health can also affect our physical health also. “Within each group, just world beliefs for self were significantly higher than just world beliefs for others, both among people with mental illness and among members of the public” (Rusch, 2010). This shows based upon a study done that people with mental illness think worse of themselves that others do, and I believe that part of this is because they feel like they can’t talk to anyone about things that have shaped them into the person that they have become. Suicide rates are escalating and there are now suicide hotlines and crisis centers for those that are having mental issues to that point.
I believe that we need to take time to encourage others and instead of judging them for their circumstances find out what is behind that circumstance. So often we will make rash decisions based upon the outside and the unfriendly voice that has come out that we fail to think, “what are they going through on the inside?” With each trial in the past few months, I try to think “what is God trying to teach me with this incident?” Mental Illness is a very large part of my brain and going through therapy and taking classes on Cognitive Behavior Therapy to unravel why I think the way I do is uncovering a lot of situations that I have tried to say I’ve gotten over but in reality I haven’t healed from those hurts before more were piled on top of it. I believe that everyone should have to see a therapist at least once a year to help with making sure those that really need help are helped and kept off the streets to prevent mass incidents that would hurt everyone. This could help eliminate the stigma of mental illness in the media with everyone needing to see someone it would become acceptable to talk about issues and get to the root of all of the issues, We all need Jesus!
“According to pollster George Barna, fewer than 10% of adults who identify themselves as born-again Christians hold to a biblical worldview”. (Phillips, 2008) For me personally, I believe in the truth of Jesus Christ and he is the risen savior. I believe that God created heaven and earth and everything in it (Genesis 1). I believe the Bible is real and that it is our guidebook for life including different circumstances that we can relate to and compare our situation to. We need to take more time to study it and apply it to our lives and I feel once we do that God will bless us for those efforts to worship him and spread his word. We should take the word seriously and when in doubt look to it for the answers that we are searching for.

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.

1 Peter 2:9 NIV

I’m not advised to go around and acting like we are better than anyone else because we are all sinners who fail daily, God loves us all and wants us to know him in a relationship that we build with him.
I believe that children should be cherished, but not enabled. I enabled my kids because I wanted them to have everything that I never had and not have to do the chores as I did. Now as adults they are ill-prepared for life and are having a hard time away from me since they left when I started to learn to quit enabling. I have learned the hard way

Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.

Proverbs 13:24 NIV

We do need more discipline and not abuse, there is a difference in my mind. The views of this generation haven’t been very biblical and that’s our fault as parents.
I want to help others overcome obstacles and bring Glory to God in all our times of trouble; he alone can soothe our souls it’s not the drugs or alcohol or approval of everyone else – only him. He should be the rock that we build our foundation on so that when the storms come, we are on that firm foundation and not washed away as if we are on sand. I believe in the Golden Rule- Treat others as we want to be treated and

Love each other as I have loved you.

John 15:12

I strive to live that way every day; helping people and loving them no matter how they act.
Overall, I believe in Jesus and the fact that he was born, lived, died and rose again all in order to grant a way to heaven for me. I believe in the Bible and that it is God’s word and instructions to us. I believe that we should live life in order to serve him and bring Glory to his name. Our purpose and mission in life should be to bring as many with us through the heavenly gates as we possibly can; and while we are here encouraging one another on this roller coaster of life. We have all lived through different tragedies and aspects of life and should lean upon each other to learn and get to the end. We will all run the same race but how we get to the finish line is very different. “God has great plans for you” Jeremiah 29:11 has become one of my favorites, he’s not done with me yet but I’m better than I used to be and want to reach out and help others get to the point that I am.
How do I implement these beliefs into my daily life is a daily struggle. I have mastered the art of being nice to people even when they don’t deserve it but am still working on boundaries in order to keep myself in check. I need to work on getting into the Word more and applying the lessons to life. I need to take a moment every day and break up the Bible into pieces and work to strengthen my relationship with God. I continue to pursue my beliefs and learn from those lessons that I have been through by starting to tell my story and help give other people hope that they can overcome and get through it also. I read a lot in order to learn more about how to deal with life and to overcome obstacles that come my way. This class has helped also with explaining unbelief to myself and how to understand more of why others may believe the way they do.
In conclusion, my beliefs are based upon the relationship with Jesus and that we all need him in order to survive. I strive daily to be a better person to glorify his name and to lead more to the kingdom of Heaven so that we can all be together forever.

Press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3:14, NIV

That is my goal in life; keep pressing towards the mark for Jesus.
 
References

Rüsch, N., Todd, A. R., Bodenhausen, G. V., & Corrigan, P. W. (2010). Do people with mental illness deserve what they get? Links between meritocratic worldviews and implicit versus explicit stigma. European Archives of Psychiatry and Clinical Neuroscience, 260(8), 617–625. doi: 10.1007/s00406-010-0111-4
Phillips, W. G., Brown, W. E., & Stonestreet, J. (2008). Making sense of your world: a biblical world view. Salem, WI: Sheffield Pub. Co.
Sire, J. W. (2015). Naming the Elephant. Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press.
Wade, R. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.leaderu.com/orgs/probe/docs/apologet.html

Peace

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I had a choice tonight; spend time with my husband whom I have barely seen or go to my support group. I chose to go to my support group and was well rewarded. The topic tonight was peace. I took notes and am adding to them also. If you need help always reach out to someone you trust. How many of us long for peace in our lives? But, where can we go to find it? In today’s society, there are so many options out there; we could pop some pills, smoke some stuff, drink a little drink and peace will come to us for a moment. But what if we could find a way to make peace a way of life?

To start off happiness is a choice that we must make. A daily choice to not let the dark clouds come in because those dark clouds of anxiety can quickly lead down the path of depression. Once depression has put you in a pit, there is a lot of climbing to get back out of that pit. With depression, it can be summed up as anger turned inward onto yourself.

Yet, the Lord longs to be gracious to you; therefore, he will rise up to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him.

Isaiah 30:18 NIV

If we choose to succumb to those dark clouds, we are giving in to the enemy who comes to “steal, to kill and to destroy” (John 10:10). The enemy is a master of putting those thoughts in our head that will drag us back down to the pit because when we stay in that pit, he is victorious. We must make that choice to overcome and to let God’s light shine through those dark clouds. No, it is not easy and takes a lot of practice. We must learn to see the glass as half full rather than half empty. How in the world can we start to do that? That sounds like a rather tall order that just is overwhelming. You are right. But, the Prince of Peace, Immanuel, our Savior is waiting to help you through and to bring peace into your life. We are not meant to live life with our heads in the sand or in a storm. We are made to be VICTORIOUS! Few steps that I’ve learned, and we discussed tonight were:

Step one is to choose God and to surrender to his will. This may mean giving up our own will and to submit to his.

For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. For this very reason, Christ died and returned to life so that he might be the Lord of both the dead and the living.

Romans 14:7-9 NIV

We have to accept the fact that Christ died for our sins and we are no longer chained to that former life. We are no longer slaves to sin but a child of the most High.

We need to see that he has given us a way to come to the Father and to submit ourselves at his feet in order to gain eternal life. God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit are there to help us along our journey. We are to call upon the Holy Spirit to help us not be afraid. It is written 365 times in the Bible to Fear Not, now if that is not a reminder for our daily lives, I am not sure what is. What we think and speak are of what is in our hearts. So, if you want good to come out, you have to put good in! When that negative thought starts knocking at the door, just say “Not Today Satan”. We have the choice to overcome those thoughts.

Step two is to identify all areas in our lives that we are not fully submitting to God. There might be that one thing that we value above him. Ask him to remove it. When I started my journey, I asked God to start pointing those things out and help me to remove them and to move past them. My two sons no longer live with me because I was putting them on pedestals above God and my husband. This was not their rightful place. (of course, there are other reasons also but that’s a different post) We have to want to fully submit all areas of our life to God and he will BLESS you more than you can even dream of. If we keep our foot in the world,

Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.

Romans 8:8

Are our prayers full of faith? Do we truly believe that God can take that faith of a mustard seed and move those mountains out of our way? Philippians 4:6-7 tells us to not be anxious about anything but talk to God about it. Let him know what you are dealing with and he will send his Holy Spirit to give you peace.

Step three is to develop a Godward mindset. We need to focus on God. Is what we are doing bringing glory to his name and spreading his good news to all. We must refocus our attention and change our viewpoint, not on the negative but to the positive! Remember the glass is half full not half empty. Start to take this mindset on everyday struggles and then move up to harder topics in your life.

Step four is to develop a dependence on the Holy Spirit. We need that desire to welcome him into our lives every day. Do we ask him to come and help us daily or sometimes think we got this? We need to ask for peace from the Holy Spirit, ask and believe that you have peace in your heart. Have him lead you to where you need to go in order to obtain that peace. God is love; he bleeds love his entire essence is love. So, with a God like that do you think he wants his children living in a storm? As a parent, I always wanted to shelter my kids from the storms of life, yet I have come to realize you have to let them go through it in order to learn how to deal with the storms. If we are always sheltered and do not learn how to deal with life, we will not understand that life can move us off our foundation if we are not planted on the Rock. How do we learn this but to go through some storms and see that we aren’t as strong as we thought we were?

Lastly but not least, PRAISE GOD in the middle of the storm. We could be going through the worst storm of our lives but if we persevere and praise God that we are going to get through it then guess what: we will with a sense of peace in our heart that surpasses all understanding. There is a reason for every storm that comes our way. Always persevere and have HOPE for a better day. It may be storming now but Joy comes in the morning. Every day is a new day to bask in our heavenly Fathers presence and love. He wants nothing but to bless His people, we just have to be open to receive that blessing.

A very dear friend of mine keeps saying, “We don’t deserve anything but Hell”, but guess what Christ made a bridge for us to get to heaven. We will all have a different journey through life and many different perspectives from the trials and storms we have been through. We need to encourage one another and to help along the path of life. If you need some encouragement reach out to someone. If you are scared, I’m always here just email me at butterflyhopekp@aol.com and we can agree together in prayer. Just as the Bible says where two or three are gathered in my name there I will be also. Let me help you and then you can pay it forward to help grow the kingdom of our Glorious King!

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

preparing for new normal…

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returning to normal…

A while back I wrote about “returning to normal”. If you haven’t read it, I pray you’ll take a quick minute and read it as the prayer still remains from me and it will help you understand where the following is coming from now…

In keeping with that same prayer through all that we have participated in thus far this year, I believe Andy Stanley has said it best in this latest from him. I pray you will give it a listen and prayerfully consider these questions he gives each of us in an effort to make the most out of this time period we are all in!

Preparing For The New Normal by Andy Stanley

What have I been doing that almost led to my undoing?

financially, relationally, personally

COVID-19 will only serve as a “wake-up” call to you, if you wake up!

Rushing back to normal will only allow what’s bad to get worse!

All of this pain with no gain, would certainly be a shame.

How can I be better for it?

What will help me remember?

Your Move with Andy Stanley | Digital Spotlight | Preparing for the New Normal

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want this time to have been for naught. I want to have learned something through these months of uncertainty. I want to embrace the transformation I have been desperately seeking all my life.

What about you? Regardless of which side of the “faith aisle” you find yourself, you surely have to have gained some insight from the past few months – of yourself, of your life, of your destiny.

We have talked several times at Anchored HOPE group regarding the importance of remembering. God repeatedly told people in the Bible to remember and to use an item of some kind as a tool to remember specific things, events accordingly.

When all the nation had finished passing over the Jordan, the Lord said to Joshua, “Take twelve men from the people, from each tribe a man, and command them, saying, ‘Take twelve stones from here out of the midst of the Jordan, from the very place where the priests’ feet stood firmly, and bring them over with you and lay them down in the place where you lodge tonight.'”

And Joshua said to them, “Pass on before the ark of the Lord your God into the midst of the Jordan, and take up each of you a stone upon his shoulder, according to the number of the tribes of the people of Israel, that this may be a sign among you. When your children ask in time to come, ‘What do these stones mean to you?’ then you shall tell them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord. When it passed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. So these stones shall be to the people of Israel a memorial forever.’

And he said to the people of Israel, “When your children ask their fathers in time to come, ‘What do these stones mean?’ then you shall let your children know, ‘Israel passed over this Jordan on dry ground.’ For the Lord your God dried up the waters of the Jordan for you until you passed over, as the Lord your God did to the Red Sea, which He dried up for us until we passed over, so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the hand of the Lord is mighty, that you may fear the Lord your God forever.”

Joshua 4:1-3, 5-7, 21-24 NLT

The problem with things in our lives is that we tend to go through them, whether we want to or not, and then we may or may not learn from them…and even more importantly we may or may not share it with others so they too can learn.

It would be an utter waste to have gone through all that time in the hospital in 2001-2002, the hell I put my family through, and not tell a soul how God used it for good! I know what helps me remember — this group God called me to faithfully lead in spite of my struggle with depression and anxiety!

I can’t wait to hear what helps you remember COVID-19. You may not be able to see it just yet, but I promise, you will some day. And I pray you continue to tell your children, and they tell their children, and so on and so on, til Jesus returns that glorious day!

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

remain…

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WARNING: this post may be a trigger for some.

Please read only if prepared and with caution.

I always try to be as transparent as possible with you all. Any of you that know me closely know that this has been a difficult year in so many spiritual ways (totally nothing to do with a pandemic the world is experiencing might I add). The spiritual warfare is real and so is the transformation…though it does come with suffering. God has reminded me time and time again of THAT word He gave me for 2020…

R E M A I N.

We will suffer when we are being transformed, when we stand with Jesus, and yet we have no inkling of what real suffering even looks like– yet.
Our suffering fails in comparison to those around the world that risk their very life and life of loved ones just to worship Him, just to have His Word! So I do not ever want to compare my suffering to theirs.
But there is coming a time friend when we will experience great suffering for our love and devotion to Him. And THIS is what He is preparing us for!
So in an effort to keep that transparency with you in my struggle of being transformed, in the very breaking of my heart and soul for my loved ones that still do not choose to live for Him as if they truly LOVED HIM…here goes!

Yesterday was a very dark day for me. It seems when physical pain and our own sinfulness, coupled with loved ones living life as they always have, ends up leaving a gap in my mind for satan to waltz right on in.  I can spiral without even knowing I have begun the spiral, in literally no time at all.
The thoughts the enemy put in my mind were more vivid than I believe they ever have been…so real that God knew I needed more help, and help He sent at precisely the time satan was having me mentally blowing my brains out. (I told you it was vivid.) I was so blinded that I could only think of the ones that would be left behind.

BUT GOD had a huge prayer warrior, that obediently listens to Him, send me a sermon from the very same person HE used long ago when I sat in the hospital bed isolated after over a year of suicide attempts.

My friend, ONLY a LOVING GOD, an ALL-KNOWING GOD can do exactly that and at exactly the perfect time!
THAT is the GOD I serve, THAT is the God I love with ALL my heart!

As I say at nearly every group meeting we have had since 2015, I would LOVE to tell you HE has healed me from ALL of this – depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, physical pain, rhumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia (that most people think is all in a person’s head anyway), degenerative disc disease all through my spine, etc. BUT He has not. What HE has chosen to do is to allow me to suffer in similar ways as others do so that I can truly understand, so that I can come alongside you and share His BEYOND AMAZING LOVE for us in that while we were still sinners HE LOVES US!!!

So I say all of THIS to say, it is crucial for us to have God-loving people within our lives at all times. It is crucial we do not leave a gap for satan to be able to walk into our lives. Our mind is one of satan’s most valuable places. Beware of that fact and be alert at all times! You better believe I was studying The Word of God and praying and the gap was still enough that the enemy could do his bidding within my mind.

But THANK GOD HE IS MORE POWERFUL AND ABLE TO DO FAR MORE!!! God has already beaten satan. We need only stand firm. And with the help of GOD Almighty, Jesus, and His Holy Spirit praying on our behalf at all times, as well as strengthening us and sustaining us, we will stand as we remain in HIM.

“Therefore put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm.”

Ephesians 6:13 NLT

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Follow the GPS

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How often do we place our trust in our GPS system to get us somewhere? I know there are days that I think I know better than my GPS and will go my own way. Those are the days I end up in even more traffic than if I had just listened to my GPS. I was reminded of this while driving to work this morning; the GPS switched in the middle of my usual route and took me a way I’d never been before but after several hours last time in traffic, I swore that I would listen to it from now on. So, I have learned to just go with it and follow what it says even if I think it sounds a little off its rocker. It was the most beautiful drive to work I think I had ever encountered. The trees are in full changing mode and there was a stream and old houses and just beauty all over reminding me that God is everywhere, and the beauty of his creation is just amazing at sunrise. What if we started thinking of God as our GPS system? How much easier would things go if we would just follow his word rather than trying to do it our way? I know for me there are times that I place my trust in God but then I try to just help him out and get it done myself. Things never seem to work out right in that instance. If we remember,

For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11

If we keep this verse close to our heart, then it makes it easier to follow his will. Oh, how wonderful it is when we line up our will with God’s will and lean on him when life gets hard. Lately I have felt a little down, the enemy has been trying to squash my dreams and plans because he knows that I’ve a story that can help many believe in God and see how mighty he is. Several wonderful people reminded me that as you get closer to God, the enemy will hit harder because he is trying to sway you. Personally, I must remember,

Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.

Proverbs 19:21

I must learn to let go and let God have his way. To trust Him no matter what my brain says, but to lean on him when I feel like the world is spinning out of control. I also need to quit relying on my own understanding and let him guide me through this roller coaster of life. So when life starts to overwhelm you and make you feel like you have no purpose remember that you may be in the cocoon from the caterpillar state and any time God is going to give you wings of a butterfly. Prepare to fly my friends, it is going to be a beautiful change for us all.

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Karen’s story

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My story is one of trauma on top of trauma then of a redemption and transformation that has been changing my life as a butterfly. I grew up in and out of rough situations with drugs and alcohol at the center of it. Violence was such a normal part of my life that it didn’t seem weird at all. Just seemed to be normal.  It wasn’t till I was a teen that God was fully introduced into my life through my stepmom and dad when I went to live with them. Life changed, but my heart and mind didn’t. Something in me was crying out for love that couldn’t be filled of this earth. I certainly tried though and when it didn’t fulfill me, I would crash into a pit thinking I was worthless and unlovable. I tried to end it all several times and included cutting into the ritual.  Little did I know even then God was trying to get my attention to turn to Him yet I rebelled and searched the earth for something that was going to love me so that I felt whole. Part of my story was a 15-year marriage that sent me fully into the pit. I had rebelled against my parents who told me not to see this man or go with him because he was leading me away from the church. To me that meant it was more exciting and enticing, he was the “bad boy”.  I was like Eve enticed by the forbidden fruit. As it says,

“But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent’s cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ.”

2 Corinthians 11:3

After a time it became evident that he was the wrong choice but then I was too prideful to admit that my parents had been right so I stuck it out thinking he would change. 

“A man of violence entices his neighbor And leads him in a way that is not good.”

Proverbs 16:29

This man was abusive towards his children and I, yet by then I was brainwashed into thinking I couldn’t go out on my own. I had been cut off from my family and friends and felt as if there was nowhere to go. I then plundered into the pit deeper than I had ever been before. I prayed to die daily, prayed for my children to be taken care of by someone better. I felt guilty of all that I had put my kids through and wanted a better life for them. When my ex went to rehab that was the beginning of change, it was my opportunity to file for divorce and realize how deep he had ruined our family financially and mentally. We began the journey of change, yet my mental state continued to decline. With the loss of my grandparents plummeting me into that pit even further I was done. Here I was planning my graduation with my Associates degree, planning a wedding to my new husband, I still couldn’t shake the feeling that I wanted to die. It was after a fight with my fiancé and my son that I reached the point that it was done. I couldn’t take anymore, and everyone was better off without me around. I physically took the knife and tried to cut myself to end it all. The knife wouldn’t cut my skin or puncture my skin at all. I nicked my finger to ensure that it was sharp, and it was, I went to plunge it into my heart and it wouldn’t go. I mean what was wrong with this picture. It was at that point, that God spoke to me. He wasn’t done with my life even though I was.

“For I know the plans I have for you… plans for your welfare, not for disaster, to give you a hope and a future”.

Jeremiah 29:11

That moment I knew it was time to get back into church and rededicate it all to him. So to say that it’s because of him that I’m still here is a dreadful understatement. I’m only alive because God stopped it so to me my life ended and this is where He started. I started looking for support and a group that would understand the mental issues that I had, a friend found Anchored Hope and sent me the information and felt I needed to check them out. Everything I have from this point on was to Glorify him and begin to help others overcome the feelings of hopelessness. He does have plans for all of us, we just need to be still and listen. 

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Returning to Normal…

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We are just beginning to hear news of when, how things are going to re-open after the COVID-19 quarantine, social distancing time period that seems to have impacted everything from toilet paper, the economy, the hospitals, to all around the world.

COVID-19 has changed life as we once knew it…no more going to the store whenever we want for just anything. No more going to work unless you are considered “essential”. No more running to get ice cream whenever we have a hankering for it. No going to the movies. No sporting events, small or large. No gathering together to worship God at church. No social gatherings over 10 people. Our lives have forever changed!

But in all the praying I have been doing during this time, one thing I have prayed through ALL of this, it’s that our lives would NEVER “return to normal”!

What? You might be asking why? Why would anyone not want to “return to normal”?

Because I pray this has been a time of reflection for each of us. A time to reflect and recognize who truly is in control of not only our lives, our country, but our entire world. A time for each of us to choose to take advantage of this and “Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10 – a much needed pause…and God has definitely got our attention!

Let’s just think for a minute, what if we haven’t taken this time seriously…what might our lives, our world look like after COVID-19? I would imagine there will be even more hate, crime, depression, anxiety, loneliness, and disasters upon disasters. We are living in the end times my friend, whether you choose to acknowledge it and believe it or not.

On the other hand let’s say we have taken this time seriously…and we have drawn near to God and He, as He promised, has drawn near to us – in James 4:8…

“Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your heart, you double-minded.”

James 4:8 NKJV

“Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your heart, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.”

James 4:8 NLT

But we can’t just take the pieces of the Bible we like or agree with. We must take the Bible as a whole, all of it as The Inspired Word of God. So let’s take a look at that next sentence. If it’s one thing we have heard well over a thousand times the past 2 or 3 months it is:

“WASH YOUR HANDS!”

CDC, News, Media, Doctors, Stores, Parents, etc.!

Both translations tell us to wash our hands! They also go on to clearly state we are “sinners“…and that is something we each must choose to acknowledge and identify within ourselves before we can recognize our need for a Savior! But it doesn’t stop with just that…it goes on to tell us to also “purify your heart”. And none of us can do that apart from God! For He loves us so much that He sent His only Son to pay for our sins! It is up to each one of us to accept this free gift of eternal life!

So no, I don’t want to just “return to normal”! Oh God Almighty how I am praying we are made new, restored, revived! Father God don’t let us just return to normal!!! Oh that this all might not be in vain!!! I don’t want to just be ok! I want us to have truly repented of our sins! Oh Father that we would turn from our wicked ways and turn to YOU like we never have before!!! I want us to have recognized our desperate need for a Savior! The ONLY ONE WORTHY, JESUS CHRIST, OUR LORD AND SAVIOR! Oh Lord may YOU then hear us from heaven and forgive our sins and restore our land. Father we desperately need YOU — ALWAYS — not just now!!! Oh God we are so very sorry for turning away from YOU, personally, as families, as churches, schools, cities, countries, all. Lord You aren’t finished with America yet! May she return to You, the Only Wise King!

In JESUS’ name, amen

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