Category: amanda

preparing for new normal…

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returning to normal…

A while back I wrote about “returning to normal”. If you haven’t read it, I pray you’ll take a quick minute and read it as the prayer still remains from me and it will help you understand where the following is coming from now…

In keeping with that same prayer through all that we have participated in thus far this year, I believe Andy Stanley has said it best in this latest from him. I pray you will give it a listen and prayerfully consider these questions he gives each of us in an effort to make the most out of this time period we are all in!

Preparing For The New Normal by Andy Stanley

What have I been doing that almost led to my undoing?

financially, relationally, personally

COVID-19 will only serve as a “wake-up” call to you, if you wake up!

Rushing back to normal will only allow what’s bad to get worse!

All of this pain with no gain, would certainly be a shame.

How can I be better for it?

What will help me remember?

Your Move with Andy Stanley | Digital Spotlight | Preparing for the New Normal

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want this time to have been for naught. I want to have learned something through these months of uncertainty. I want to embrace the transformation I have been desperately seeking all my life.

What about you? Regardless of which side of the “faith aisle” you find yourself, you surely have to have gained some insight from the past few months – of yourself, of your life, of your destiny.

We have talked several times at Anchored HOPE group regarding the importance of remembering. God repeatedly told people in the Bible to remember and to use an item of some kind as a tool to remember specific things, events accordingly.

When all the nation had finished passing over the Jordan, the Lord said to Joshua, “Take twelve men from the people, from each tribe a man, and command them, saying, ‘Take twelve stones from here out of the midst of the Jordan, from the very place where the priests’ feet stood firmly, and bring them over with you and lay them down in the place where you lodge tonight.'”

And Joshua said to them, “Pass on before the ark of the Lord your God into the midst of the Jordan, and take up each of you a stone upon his shoulder, according to the number of the tribes of the people of Israel, that this may be a sign among you. When your children ask in time to come, ‘What do these stones mean to you?’ then you shall tell them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord. When it passed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. So these stones shall be to the people of Israel a memorial forever.’

And he said to the people of Israel, “When your children ask their fathers in time to come, ‘What do these stones mean?’ then you shall let your children know, ‘Israel passed over this Jordan on dry ground.’ For the Lord your God dried up the waters of the Jordan for you until you passed over, as the Lord your God did to the Red Sea, which He dried up for us until we passed over, so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the hand of the Lord is mighty, that you may fear the Lord your God forever.”

Joshua 4:1-3, 5-7, 21-24 NLT

The problem with things in our lives is that we tend to go through them, whether we want to or not, and then we may or may not learn from them…and even more importantly we may or may not share it with others so they too can learn.

It would be an utter waste to have gone through all that time in the hospital in 2001-2002, the hell I put my family through, and not tell a soul how God used it for good! I know what helps me remember — this group God called me to faithfully lead in spite of my struggle with depression and anxiety!

I can’t wait to hear what helps you remember COVID-19. You may not be able to see it just yet, but I promise, you will some day. And I pray you continue to tell your children, and they tell their children, and so on and so on, til Jesus returns that glorious day!

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

remain…

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WARNING: this post may be a trigger for some.

Please read only if prepared and with caution.

I always try to be as transparent as possible with you all. Any of you that know me closely know that this has been a difficult year in so many spiritual ways (totally nothing to do with a pandemic the world is experiencing might I add). The spiritual warfare is real and so is the transformation…though it does come with suffering. God has reminded me time and time again of THAT word He gave me for 2020…

R E M A I N.

We will suffer when we are being transformed, when we stand with Jesus, and yet we have no inkling of what real suffering even looks like– yet.
Our suffering fails in comparison to those around the world that risk their very life and life of loved ones just to worship Him, just to have His Word! So I do not ever want to compare my suffering to theirs.
But there is coming a time friend when we will experience great suffering for our love and devotion to Him. And THIS is what He is preparing us for!
So in an effort to keep that transparency with you in my struggle of being transformed, in the very breaking of my heart and soul for my loved ones that still do not choose to live for Him as if they truly LOVED HIM…here goes!

Yesterday was a very dark day for me. It seems when physical pain and our own sinfulness, coupled with loved ones living life as they always have, ends up leaving a gap in my mind for satan to waltz right on in.  I can spiral without even knowing I have begun the spiral, in literally no time at all.
The thoughts the enemy put in my mind were more vivid than I believe they ever have been…so real that God knew I needed more help, and help He sent at precisely the time satan was having me mentally blowing my brains out. (I told you it was vivid.) I was so blinded that I could only think of the ones that would be left behind.

BUT GOD had a huge prayer warrior, that obediently listens to Him, send me a sermon from the very same person HE used long ago when I sat in the hospital bed isolated after over a year of suicide attempts.

My friend, ONLY a LOVING GOD, an ALL-KNOWING GOD can do exactly that and at exactly the perfect time!
THAT is the GOD I serve, THAT is the God I love with ALL my heart!

As I say at nearly every group meeting we have had since 2015, I would LOVE to tell you HE has healed me from ALL of this – depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, physical pain, rhumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia (that most people think is all in a person’s head anyway), degenerative disc disease all through my spine, etc. BUT He has not. What HE has chosen to do is to allow me to suffer in similar ways as others do so that I can truly understand, so that I can come alongside you and share His BEYOND AMAZING LOVE for us in that while we were still sinners HE LOVES US!!!

So I say all of THIS to say, it is crucial for us to have God-loving people within our lives at all times. It is crucial we do not leave a gap for satan to be able to walk into our lives. Our mind is one of satan’s most valuable places. Beware of that fact and be alert at all times! You better believe I was studying The Word of God and praying and the gap was still enough that the enemy could do his bidding within my mind.

But THANK GOD HE IS MORE POWERFUL AND ABLE TO DO FAR MORE!!! God has already beaten satan. We need only stand firm. And with the help of GOD Almighty, Jesus, and His Holy Spirit praying on our behalf at all times, as well as strengthening us and sustaining us, we will stand as we remain in HIM.

“Therefore put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm.”

Ephesians 6:13 NLT

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

HOPE in the midst of depression…

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There is HOPE in the midst of pain, in the midst of depression. Psalm 77:1-3 says it so well:

“I cry out to God; yes, I shout.

Oh, that God would listen to me!

When I was in deep trouble, I searched for the Lord. All night long I prayed, with hands lifted toward heaven, but my soul was not comforted.

I think of God, and I moan, overwhelmed with longing for His help.”

Psalm 77:1-3

The Psalmist continues for several more verses of the despair we know all too well. He knew what it felt like to be in the pit of depression and yet not feel the comfort of the Father.

But – just as he gives weigh to his despair, he recalls all God has done in verses 11 through the rest of the chapter…

“But then I recall all You have done, O Lord; I remember Your wonderful deeds of long ago.

They are constantly in my thoughts. I cannot stop thinking about Your mighty works.”

The Psalmist takes his focus off himself, his problems, his feelings and begins to worship Our Heavenly Father! Our God is ever faithful! Even when we can’t see it, even when we can’t feel it…He is always on the throne and in complete control – even when…!

Satan would LOVE for us to keep our focus on ourselves, our pitiful lives.

DO NOT GIVE SATAN THE CHANCE TO DECEIVE YOU ANY LONGER!

Psalm 86 reminds us to keep calling on God constantly! He knows what our pain feels like. He knows how weary and tired we get. He knows how our troubles and pain can be so great that all we can do is cry out to Him. Even when there is no relief in sight, He wants us to trust Him, acknowledge His greatness and trust Him as we wait for better days ahead. We have the assurance of Him answering our prayers. We need only trust in His will and His perfect timing.

CHOOSE today Whom you will serve! CHOOSE today to remember ALL He has done in and through your life! And commit to telling it to your family, your children, their children!

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

Returning to Normal…

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We are just beginning to hear news of when, how things are going to re-open after the COVID-19 quarantine, social distancing time period that seems to have impacted everything from toilet paper, the economy, the hospitals, to all around the world.

COVID-19 has changed life as we once knew it…no more going to the store whenever we want for just anything. No more going to work unless you are considered “essential”. No more running to get ice cream whenever we have a hankering for it. No going to the movies. No sporting events, small or large. No gathering together to worship God at church. No social gatherings over 10 people. Our lives have forever changed!

But in all the praying I have been doing during this time, one thing I have prayed through ALL of this, it’s that our lives would NEVER “return to normal”!

What? You might be asking why? Why would anyone not want to “return to normal”?

Because I pray this has been a time of reflection for each of us. A time to reflect and recognize who truly is in control of not only our lives, our country, but our entire world. A time for each of us to choose to take advantage of this and “Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10 – a much needed pause…and God has definitely got our attention!

Let’s just think for a minute, what if we haven’t taken this time seriously…what might our lives, our world look like after COVID-19? I would imagine there will be even more hate, crime, depression, anxiety, loneliness, and disasters upon disasters. We are living in the end times my friend, whether you choose to acknowledge it and believe it or not.

On the other hand let’s say we have taken this time seriously…and we have drawn near to God and He, as He promised, has drawn near to us – in James 4:8…

“Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your heart, you double-minded.”

James 4:8 NKJV

“Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your heart, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.”

James 4:8 NLT

But we can’t just take the pieces of the Bible we like or agree with. We must take the Bible as a whole, all of it as The Inspired Word of God. So let’s take a look at that next sentence. If it’s one thing we have heard well over a thousand times the past 2 or 3 months it is:

“WASH YOUR HANDS!”

CDC, News, Media, Doctors, Stores, Parents, etc.!

Both translations tell us to wash our hands! They also go on to clearly state we are “sinners“…and that is something we each must choose to acknowledge and identify within ourselves before we can recognize our need for a Savior! But it doesn’t stop with just that…it goes on to tell us to also “purify your heart”. And none of us can do that apart from God! For He loves us so much that He sent His only Son to pay for our sins! It is up to each one of us to accept this free gift of eternal life!

So no, I don’t want to just “return to normal”! Oh God Almighty how I am praying we are made new, restored, revived! Father God don’t let us just return to normal!!! Oh that this all might not be in vain!!! I don’t want to just be ok! I want us to have truly repented of our sins! Oh Father that we would turn from our wicked ways and turn to YOU like we never have before!!! I want us to have recognized our desperate need for a Savior! The ONLY ONE WORTHY, JESUS CHRIST, OUR LORD AND SAVIOR! Oh Lord may YOU then hear us from heaven and forgive our sins and restore our land. Father we desperately need YOU — ALWAYS — not just now!!! Oh God we are so very sorry for turning away from YOU, personally, as families, as churches, schools, cities, countries, all. Lord You aren’t finished with America yet! May she return to You, the Only Wise King!

In JESUS’ name, amen

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

DEEPER

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First off let me say, this post began February 20, 2020…it is only now as I finalize it and proofread it that we are in the state that we are currently in with COVID-19. Life is too short – I pray you will choose to take action today!

Hum…you gotta do some REAL heart searching when it takes you 6 years to get around to finishing that book.
God has a BIG plan and in HIS perfect timing…but in HIS own way  — NOT mine!
This is the book HE definitely gave me when the counselor said, “you need to go deeper.” She had no idea there was even such a book…she meant literally in my relationship with God.

So, I left there in tears and praying – how on earth do I go any deeper in my relationship with You Lord? I prayed as I drove by McKays (a massive store that sells used books, etc.) that I wouldn’t look at anything else…only what God pointed out for me…since shopping is my “go to” when I’m struggling with depression. And I kid you not – the first book I came to and saw on the shelf – there it was — DEEPER by Debbie Alsdorf.
God had once again answered my prayers!

But life… specifically our marriage, was restored better than ever before, and well I got distracted and life continued with the selling of our home because of my health. So, this book got placed in one of many boxes as we downsized.

Until… I heard The Father say, “it’s time to go deeper.” I knew immediately what He was referring to — so I led a Bible study with friends on Deeper. Awesome study, but once again life…cancelled groups, not everyone is able to make it, so I kept putting it off – once again prolonging the finishing of this book. We finally did end up finishing the book as a group with me and only one other… and yet I still have this overwhelming feeling knowing there’s still so much more God had planned for ME in this book, in this time of truly going deeper with Him!

Months later I felt an overwhelming sense and desire to go back through the book, the study, notetaking, highlighting, underlining! God is speaking directly to me “for such a time as this!” I continue to be blown away by His truths in this book, how every word touches my heart, touches an unhealed wound, cuts to my core — there’s still so much more He has for me, if only I would go deeper in Him, in my relationship with Him, in my trusting Him, in my love for Him, in my surrender to Him! But you know what other book speaks even more so than this one has to just me…. HIS WORD, the BIBLE!!!

Then God leads me on an awesome 24-hour getaway with loved ones for a women’s retreat! And what is the topic…”Embrace the Transformation”. Embracing the transformation God is doing in and through you, whether you like it or not. Just like the caterpillar has no choice about going into the cocoon…

“One day, the caterpillar stops eating, hangs upside down from a twig or leaf and spins itself a silky cocoon or molts into a shiny chrysalis. Within its protective casing, the caterpillar radically transforms its body, eventually emerging as a butterfly or moth.”

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/caterpillar-butterfly-metamorphosis-explainer/

There are so many descriptions of the caterpillar’s transformation, yet this one struck me most:

“In order to be able to become a butterfly, the caterpillar has to fall apart completely, decompose down to its very essence, devoid of any shape or consciousness. It literally dies. There is nothing left of it.”

https://medium.com/the-story-hall/chrysalis-or-why-the-caterpillar-must-die-f932b8c3700a

Even at the depths of our soul, even those unknowing, untrusting of God, cry out for this transformation! Oh, my friend, if only, if only we would trust The Creator of the world! If we could just begin to grasp His amazing love for us, even while we were still sinners, His amazing, sacrificial love for each of us! We would want a relationship with Him! He has a purpose and plan for each one of us! We each have a specific role, purpose to play in His divine plan!

I have so much growing to do…we all do! And the first thing is learning we can trust this God, Creator of the world, Lover of our souls, Friend, and Savior. Every day He is calling us to come away with Him, to a place where we can be still and know that He is God. What’s stopping you from coming near to Him? Is it anger at how God handled, or didn’t handle something in your life? Is it trust issues? Is it because you look around this world and think how on earth could He let all these things happen if He truly loves us? Oh, my friend, I understand. I get it. And more importantly – He gets it and He’s right there waiting for you to give Him a chance to speak into your life.

I’m obediently following His command to me to be available 24/7 for those hurting and suffering in the pit of depression. You don’t have to suffer in silence, you aren’t alone in this struggle! I understand more than you know and am willing to come alongside you as you go on this journey through life. If you are like me, you’ve tried everything else in this world – why not give Him a try!!!

Join us and start truly living now!!!

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

mundane

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What do we have to be thankful for in the mundane of every day life? Well let’s face it, though we go through everyday life, doing the same old thing, day after day — we do have an opportunity to make the most of every second of our time. And it is in those very seconds that we are able to grow, learn, and strengthen our relationship with God so that when the highs and lows of life come along, which they always do, you are prepared. You are equipped to handle them with His strength, His power. You are able to see the highs and lows through a different lens. You aren’t completely drained, empty, or void of all He is.We must choose each day, regardless of how busy we are going here and there, to be still and know that He is Lord. Psalm 46:10 We must choose each day to get alone with God and position ourselves in a manner where He can speak truth to us, where we can hear His voice! Let’s face it, we all live with way too many hurts, lies that have held us in bondage for far too long! I don’t know about you, but I’m for one tired of living to please everyone, knowing that I will never be able to please anyone! But I do know The Creator of the world, and He knew me before I was ever formed in the womb, Jeremiah 1:5. He created me for a specific purpose…and guess what — He created you for a specific purpose too!So in order to understand more fully what that purpose is, why we are even here in this world, we must choose to be still and allow God our full attention. It’s in the mundane of life that we must choose to be proactive so that we won’t be reactive. When everything in life is out of the ordinary it can be too much. Because mundane isn’t of the ordinary, we can and should take advantage of every second to be still, draw near to God. That’s when He speaks to us, preparing us for the road ahead, the highs and the lows.I’d love the opportunity to talk with you about how God continues to use the mundane in life for me…and prayerfully come alongside you as you too make the most of the mundane!

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

this TRUTH will set you free!

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The TRUTH will set you free! I’m sure you’ve heard this all throughout your life…or at least I have. Yet there is soooo much more to this than you could ever begin to imagine!

You see when I was in the beginning stages of trying to get well after my last hospitalization in 2002 for all the suicide attempts and ending the ECTs that weren’t working anyway, God took me in a direction, a direction I never knew would actually circle back around at this time in life. A time when my everyday life has proved doctors wrong time and time again, in spite of the chronic pain and health problems I endure. A time when I’ve been obedient to His calling to share my horrific experience, embarrassing story among not just anyone, but among other Christians, here God brings me back to where He took me well over 15 years ago! Ok…enough thinking back, are you ready for me to get on with the story? Okay, okay…but I am just beyond words! I’m just so completely overwhelmed at His amazing goodness, His amazing grace, His love and joy unspeakable…and all in spite of me and my efforts to end it all, to refuse to trust Him, to choose, even today, everything except Him!

Hold on friend – here we go!

God blessed me with a pastor, mentor and friend that I never fully appreciated as much as I have these past few years, Rev. Don Winn. He never failed to come and visit me in the hospital during that long, drawn out year…though I turned him a way time and time again, though I repeatedly tried to take my own life. Bro. Don was always there, always pointing me back to God and His love and forgiveness. I am beyond grateful for people just like him that God has brought into my life, and at the most critical times in my life!

You see Bro. Don introduced me to Bill and Anabelle Gillham through Lifetime Guarantee which opened me up to the life changing truths that I had never fully grasped all my life, truths that I never grasped even though I was raised in the church — everyday those doors were open! Now, whether that is because of me, my stubbornness, God’s timing, I don’t know and at this point I’m just beyond thankful for God’s grace to finally get it to stick – in my heart… not just my head! I highly urge you to check out their ministry…and especially the book – it was the beginning of the transforming of amanda, and the journey is continuing on even now! Lifetime Guarantee

Bro. Don took us through The Life study Bill and Anabelle Gillham have, The Life DVD Series FREE on YouTube. I highly recommend this series, though it was just the beginning for this journey in my life, I pray you aren’t as stubborn as I. At HOPE I like to take on a more positive view of myself, determined, rather than stubborn!

Once finished with that study, I had many a talk with Bro. Don and all the therapy sessions with professionals in Nashville, both Christian and non-Christian, medications, etc. — yet that hopelessness still loomed over me. But my hunger for God was more alive every day, so I asked Bro. Don if there was a better Christian counseling I could go to, and he pointed me in the direction of Grace Life in Brentwood. I remember it was a most unusual and surreal environment…yet similar to every counseling office I had ever been in before. This is where I was introduced to something so amazing, life-changing…Transformation Prayer Ministry. This method of counseling took me to a place I never knew existed, a place where things I held deep within my heart, and in the recesses of my mind would come to the forefront, a place where God would reveal His truth about the things I had come to believe that were not true at all. I had no idea the potential this type of prayer could do in my life until God has brought this back around, now 15 years later!

When we listen to God, that still, small voice, we never know what we are in for until we obey! And last week was one of those occasions as I was cleaning up the countless emails, delete, delete, spam, trash, etc. But there was one, one God clearly, but ever so quietly said, ‘Open’. I hesitated for a few seconds then went back to it and opened it. A free seminar by the author and his son on the revisions they had made to the original counseling model, Transformation Prayer Ministry. I hit the link, sought out the nearest location to me, and wouldn’t ya know they had recently added a Bowling Green, Kentucky, seminar! So in obedience, I signed up!

I was nervous, jittery, and restless the closer it came time for me to go to this seminar. I even found every excuse in the book, in my mind, ultimately in my heart to not go. But in all of that, I continued to pray for God to help me do exactly what He had called me to do at this time in life…regardless of the doors it opened up from the unknown lies within my mind and the fear plaguing my entire being.

You see last year I went through Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend. If you’ve never read this book, as every counselor, therapist I have ever had had instructed me to do since I was 13, I highly recommend you pick it up and read it, study it with a group and put the practices of this book into your every day life…but that’s a story for another day. I told my friend that I didn’t need to go through this as my boundaries were all good, but there again God spoke up and said “take it” so I did…thinking now with a new season in life with adult children and them beginning to get married, I’m sure I could learn some new boundaries! And toward the end of that study, that’s when it all opened up…worse than the mystery container in the refrigerator that has been pushed to the back far too many times– stinking, rotting, and oh so painful…but more than any of that – fear – yeah fear rose up in me at the very thought of there being something hidden deep within the recesses of my mind, my heart that needed yet to still be worked on, that needed still yet God’s truth applied – more than any band-aid has ever been needed…this was an outright cancerous growth that had to be dealt with once and for all!

Gosh! I got mad, irritated, and the suicidal thoughts returned out of nowhere! I hadn’t had any of those in soooooo long! But now, here, at this specific time, here they came…even more clearly and plaguing moment by moment than the past 15 years! I prayed asking God where in the world these were coming from, recognizing they were not of me, my sound mind I had come to learn and live by and now teach to others week after week, for over 3 years now! “Untruths that needed His truth applied,” God said. And then I remembered back to my time in counseling, the transforming prayers that had replaced the lies within my mind, with truths from God Himself! I was so afraid! I was afraid of whatever was in my past that still remained, that even after it all was said and done and I had come so far, yet still lingered within the recesses of my mind and held my heart hostage like no other! I prayed God would help me come to grips with it…that He would give me the courage to allow Him to do what only God can do! Weeks later, I finally gave up, I surrendered to God Almighty and said, “Ok – I’m ready Lord…let’s do this.”

A year later…yeah remember our time is never God’s time! And He is such a Gentleman! He never forces us into anything we aren’t truly ready for! So He gave me a full year my friend before the journey back to it all!

He is still revealing piece by piece, day by day, lie with truth…and I’m sure He’ll continue to do so til the day I meet Him face to face…but I trust Him and with His help I will remain in His will as He continues to transform me ever so gently! Though I’m sure, like you, I wish He’d hurry up and get it over with…but then I have no idea what lies are to be dealt with — He knows…and guess what? HE knows exactly how much I can handle through His Helper and in just the perfect timing!

Friend, I pray you will Join Me on this journey! You see God doesn’t want this kept a secret! He wants this healing, this truth revealed, shared with every person that is held in bondage to their past, bondage to their pain, bondage to the lies they have come to believe and live by…as this is the only way they will ever begin to live in the hope of healing only He can bring!

Piece by piece, lie by lie, He will heal every one with His healing truth!

Heart-of-Stone

This
TRUTH
will
set
you
free!

More information will be coming soon as we begin to setup times for teaching and training Transformation Prayer!

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

Need to Escape…

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When every part of me wants to run, to hide, to not exist anymore…I have a choice to make.  It may be a split second choice, or it may be a recurring choice, but regardless – I have a choice…and so do you!

We probably have never met, but I assure you, we are facing the same need, the same desire for escape – that desperate need to get away, to retreat, to find a way to breathe again, to keep life, circumstances from crashing in on us, to stop the agonizing pain that leaves us paralyzed in fear and lost in a world that cares not for what we suffer.

Just when I think I will never have to face this feeling, this need, this overwhelming desire to escape…here it comes again!

I don’t know what you are going through, or what has brought you to this place.  But I know the One that does know and He understands far more than you could ever imagine!  He is the One and Only reason why I continue to press on, to persevere, to choose to wait it out, knowing He has a better plan ahead, knowing He will use it for good!

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them.  For God knew His people in advance, and He chose them to become like His Son, so that His Son would be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.”

Romans 8:28-29 NLT

I have learned in my walk with God, in my growing relationship with Him, that I can trust Him.  I can trust His Word as His Promise, His Truth, and He keeps it all!  He always has and He always will!  And He has never failed me yet…and even when my “old self” is crying out with all I have, and Satan is tempting me to doubt yet again, I still know that I know and I trust Him!  He has a much better plan ahead for me, even if I can’t see it yet, and even if I never do in this lifetime!

So…what do I do with that overwhelming,
all consuming, desperate need to escape?

I RUN TO HIM AS HARD AND FAST AS I CAN!

He has wide open arms waiting for me, cause He already knows what I’m feeling before I begin feeling it, before it wells up within me, consuming my entire being!  And He’s prepared, He’s ready to comfort, to reassure, and give me His peace that is beyond anything this world could ever offer!

Oh I’m begging you – get to know HIM!  Give Him a chance to reveal more of Himself to you day by day!  He has so much love, comfort, joy, hope and peace for you…far greater than anything or anyone you will ever hope to find in this world!

If you have questions, want to talk, or are struggling with depression…I’m here for you. I do understand. Feel free to contact me. I promise to respond to every email, phone call I get. And if you live in Clarksville, Tennessee, I would love to meet you at our group that meets each Thursday night!

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

Til Next Time

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Only God can truly know when we are beat down, depressed, and tired of aimlessly going on.  And only God can truly fix that for and within us!

Why He chooses to heal some people completely and others get temporary assistance til the next time it happens…I have no idea.  But — I do trust The One that IS IN CONTROL and that truly KNOWS BEST!

Does that mean I still face doubts, uncertainties, and yes – even depression – well yeah!  I’m one of the ones that gets the temporary assistance til next time.

Hi – glad to meet ya!

So here’s the next time…God hasn’t chosen to heal me of clinical depression, nor chronic pain that radiates throughout my body (fibromyalgia), nor rhumatoid arthritis, nor degenerative disc disease that has compromised not only my lumbar but also my cervial and now thoracic spine.  But He has chosen to give me exactly what I need and when I need it most — His grace!  And believe me it is beyond more than enough to get me through til the next time!

You might be asking, “How is she so sure?” or “Why does she bother with ‘God’ when He obviously isn’t going to ‘fix’ her?”  BECAUSE….oh the many ways because!

TrustHim

The latest because is when the spine implant that was just replaced in December 2018 has failed in less than 6 months…never charged properly from the day it was replaced and went completely out with no explanation from doctors and engineers.  I’m just told I have to have it done all over again at the expense of an $11,000 deductible.
Nope – God has not told me I have to do that.  In fact God has completely told me to rely on His grace which is sufficient for me each day to not only get me through the day but to thrive each day.  Is that without difficulty?  No.  Is that without pain?  No.  Is that without God?  No!  He’s right there with me every step of the way and He is giving me more than enough to do what needs to be done each day that I trust Him, rely on Him, and look to Him for my everything!  Because HE is my everything!!!  And just to remind me of His all in all, He has given me two amazing friends that are in constant prayer for me and always available to listen, to help, and to pray some more!

I pray for you!  I pray that you will give Him a few minutes of your time each day.  He has so much in store for you.  He’s not finished with you yet my friend!  He loves you beyond all you could ever understand this side of heaven!  He’s already done so much for you, more than you could ever understand this side of heaven!  So what are you waiting for?

If you have questions, want to talk, or are struggling with depression…I’m here for you.  I do understand.  Feel free to contact me.  I promise to respond to every email, phone call I get.  And if you live in Clarksville, Tennessee, I would love to meet you at our group that meets each Thursday night!

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.

Not that empty…

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And so it goes…
Insomnia, physical pain, mind foggy with cobwebs that seem to go nowhere yet leading everywhere…

Get up anyway!

Writing along and

the pen running out of ink…

yet when I open it up

I can clearly see it is almost full of ink!

What!?

God gave me this as an example of my current state of mind…I feel so frustrated at the constant pain I am in, the chaos and clutter that has taken over my life, the clothes mounting up everywhere I look, the dust and pet hair, the dishes that seem to multiply though I’ve only eaten granola bars, crackers and ice cream from the box, so many things to do – yet a desire to do none…

Get up anyway!

Try to do something and only feel as though it fails as pain ramps up even more…back to bed and heating pad I go.

If this was a screenplay it would be take 342!

My mind, body and faith feel so weak, so empty…just like my hope and joy. I’m so tired of living day in and day out like this.

And though, when I refocus on Him, when I take a moment to breathe and ask Him for clarity, He reveals I’m not as empty as I feel…much like this ink pen!

Satan would love to have us believe our feelings, be distracted, and even give up completely!
This is why we must constantly be in the Word, be in prayer, surround ourselves with praying people. Whether we feel like it or not! We cannot go through life based on our feelings! We must recalibrate. We need a fresh point of reference. We need to reboot. We need a filling of the Holy Spirit every day and all throughout the day.

God never intended us to go through every day life on our own steam, our own effort. He created us with a dependence on Him, a desperate need for Him! And nothing in this world, nor anyone, can ever fill or satisfy this need within each of us – only God!

So here’s to praying we each get up, look up and fill up! He’s waiting for each of us to do just that! He’s patient! Oh He never wants to rush us or push us… He’s a perfect Gentleman!

So what are you waiting for?

What is holding you back?

“I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in Him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.”

Romans 15:13 NLT

For more information regarding Anchored HOPE please contact us.